Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize