she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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