called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize