I'm gonna have a badass scar
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
