Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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