Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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