ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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