More tranny stories later!
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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