Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize