After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
