the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Can you repeat that, but with context?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Randomize
