I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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