what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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