operation harelip BJ is a go
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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