3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
