So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
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My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
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Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...