nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
A bitchslap is in order.
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