apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
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