She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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