Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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