Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
