We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize
