how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize