I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
