I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Come on in and take your pants off
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