Will you blow on my dice?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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