I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
