just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
