I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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