Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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