She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I wish i was in the wii world.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
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