i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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