i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I AM VODKA MAN
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
