I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
