Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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