sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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