Who wears a wallet chain?!
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
