Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
