he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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