well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Enjoy the penises
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
