just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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