I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Randomize
