absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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