We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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