chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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