Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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