I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
