i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize