Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
