I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
